The Mustache Experience – Experiments With A Hairy Face
- Women said I should shave, unanimously. (my wife, especially)
- Men gave me false confidence and all repeatedly complemented me. (wasn’t my end goal, but nice to receive the vote of confidence.)
Now, here’s what happened when I shaved 4/5ths of my beard and left a rabbit’s tail on my upper lip:
1. Women were absolutely horrified (especially, my wife.)
I received insults, such as:
- You look like a pedophile.
- It looks like something died on your face. …and, is rotting.
- You look like a pornstar.
- Don’t go to parks, or parents will freak out.
- You should really shave that, immediately. What are people going to think?
2. Men loved it. (and were SUPER enthused.)
I received compliments, such as:
- You look like a handsome fellow.
- You look like Popeye.
- You look like the Magnum PI porn star! Look out Ron Jeremy!!
- OUTSTANDING! I love it.
- I would NOT shave that. I think it makes a statement when you walk into a room.
…effectively, all extremely positive feedback. And even a possible career opportunity!
Amazing discrepancy though, huh?
How disappointing.
Interestingly, the mustache was significantly more polarizing for people as they interacted with me. As the days went on, I’d forget I even had it, have to step back and think, and wonder why interactions weren’t the same as normal:
Some women exerted a forceful power, others couldn’t even make eye contact and had eyes of intimidation; only a few snickered.
Men pretty much let me do whatever I wanted, no matter how unreasonable. I was instant alpha with the demonstration of protruding hair on my lip.
*NOTE: My advice for the man that could use a raise at work: find a great fake-mustache you can sport at work (don’t get caught!) and take it off when you come home. I’m pretty sure you’ll rise to the top of the company. Or, grow a real mustache, prepare for the worst at home, and invest in your future. Once you get to the top, you can figure out what to do next.
**SECOND NOTE: The female mustache may not accomplish the same thing and could potentially work against you. In this situation, it’s best not to have a mustache, in my opinion.
Men, have you ever had a similar experience?
I’m all for you growing hair on your face, but so are most guys. Just imagine it in reverse, and I think you might realize why it’s not working for us anymore…
or
Ladies, have you ever felt you were in a similar position for something silly?
I can only imagine the social pressures you experience to not ever get caught without make-up, shaved legs, armpits, etc. It’s a lot to keep up with, but does it really make this kind of blatant difference when you walk out the door?
Please comment below.
32 Comments
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Hey K – the first thought that came to mind – Freddie Mercury is back from the dead !! Rock on.
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I’m just coming off chemo and mustache of 40 years is THIN. Hair (lack of) is issue, too.
Been wondering what to do. Kind of liberating to see a different look. Female comments have gone both ways.
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I’d guess that increasing testosterone and growth hormone would both help. Have you ever had a chance to read Roman’s book?
Engineering the Alpha — Man 2.0
It’s awesome, and it’ll walk you through how to build growth hormone, which leads to a more ‘alpha’ state; ultimately, I believe the modification of male hormones, naturally, will likely increase the amount of facial hair, as well. (just a guess, but a pretty good one)
Here’s the link: http://www.amazon.com/Man-2-0-Engineering-Alpha-Muscle/dp/006222087X/ref=sr_sp-atf_title_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1384892205&sr=8-1&keywords=engineering+the+alpha
hope this helps and congrats on beating cancer!
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Hi Dr Kareem!
As many have said, you are just gorgeous with or without facial hair BUT if I had to kiss you and snuggle up against you (ie if I was in your wife’s shoes) then definitely clean shaven is my vote! Ha, you’re an ace 😉 and thanks for helping me in my quest to lose weight – I am about to start your 14 day program (that, believe it or not, I purchased a few weeks ago… :/) Better late than never right?! xxx
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One of my best friends told me the same thing! This is hilarious.
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Kareem- I think you are sexy no matter what you wear on your face! BUT it does help knowing who you are and what you look like sans hair! 🙂 Do what makes you happy!
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Thank you Karen 🙂
You’re very sweet. And I appreciate the compliment. You just made my day!
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You should make it an annual occurrence and sign up for MOvember next year.. great cause
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Movember is awesome, on all levels. I concur.
Prostate Cancer is something we don’t understand at all, yet prostate enlargement or cancer to happen to everyone. Why?
It’s one of those things we consider ‘normal aging’ that really shouldn’t be… unless we can classify all forms of cancer as this. And the repercussions of surgery can be devastating (at least the open procedure, rather than scope.)
I just may sign up next year, Paul… but I’ll have to mix it up a bit and make it more of a Fu Manchu or something — hehe.
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I recommending doing what your wife prefers.
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I am a woman, and I have to say the mustache and shades are really sexy!! the beard had promise, but needed a little more time, growth, trimming and shaping.. it could have been great too.. but then I will confess, my husband has worn a beard and mustache ever since we started dating.. well kept face hair on a man can be very sexy..
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I absolutely like the beard thing, but the mustache reminds me of one of Ben Stiller movies :))
The dodgeball. Looks like mmmm 1970sh thing. Pass on mustache 🙂What about shaving ur full head?! That would be interesting summer style.
Enjoy
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Dodgeball is one of my favorite movies!
“If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.”
🙂
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Haha. Then you can keep the mustache 🙂
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Is that really how you spell ‘moustache’ in the States?
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I love a moustache, hate a beard.
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Kareem: from my interactions with your blogs and your company, I believe you are a warm hearted, generous, caring man with awesome intelligence, charisma and concern for others. In other words, a great human being. You already know that the person that you are inside is what is most important. Mustaches, cars, money, position in life are all transient. And always trust your wife. She is your most important asset.
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You are so sweet. Thank you. (I’m smiling ear to ear)
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Salaams Dr K – Greetings from Bulgaria.
Physiologists tell us that, as regards secondary sexual characteristics, a man’s beard is directly equivalent to a woman’s breasts. Surveys repeatedly show that around two thirds of women do not like beards. Now find me a man who does not like breasts. You see the conflict here? There could be nothing more natural for a man than having a beard (and I have had a full beard since it would grow) so the fact that most women do NOT like beards is clearly unnatural, a societal conditioned “idea” without logic. Also a Western idea – try doing a similar survey in the Islamic world and I am confident that the two thirds preference would be at least reversed.
I wrote a poem about this called “Grow Your Own” subtitled “In defense of beards” and you can read it here: http://www.poems.ibraheem.dk/2008/04/grow-your-own.html -
I love getting all your great fitness emails, but this one made me literally laugh out loud on several occasions! I do not like beards on any men, but do love the 5 o’clock shadow. My vote is with your wife – lose the mustache. Your clean shaven face is nice (I guess because that is how we are accustomed to seeing you). I agree with Rhees on the Freddie Mercury comment. LOL
My husband has a mustache like yours, and that is how I met him twenty odd years ago. He looks
ridiculous without one. JS-
happy to entertain, Mina 🙂
It was fun to write!
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Of all the articles and advice you’ve written, I can’t believe that THIS one is what prompted me to comment. I am a woman, and I LOVE a good-looking beard on a man. I love beards on my husband. I also love it when he shaves it off. I can’t stop looking at him—it’s like I have a new man! Getting back to the beard, my husband likes his fluffy. One of the ideas we’ve had is for him to use conditioner on his beard. It makes it softer when it gets a little prickly. I like the look of your beard (only it has to grow out some more) over the mustache. One more comment: I am stunned at the number of women who feel the need to come up to my husband and make horrid remarks about his beard. I think that’s really awful. Anyway, interesting observations and interesting topic. Thanks, Kareem.
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It’s a pleasure to meet you, Chris 🙂
I look forward to getting to know you.
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Why are you wondering why most women don’t like men with facial hair? Men, try smooshing your face and lips on a brillo pad for as long as you’d kiss your girl. Change to a hog bristle brush just for the real experience. Scrub yourself ‘down there’ for a while. If it doesn’t turn you off, check your tongue for bristles, and look for a soothing cream for your carpet rash, it just means your skin isn’t as delicate as ours. Or, maybe you’re a little weird.
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This one’s vivid 😉
Ouch.
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I just wanted to pop in and let you know how much I’m LOVING everyone’s comments up here — haha! This is great 🙂
It’s really funny how polarizing facial hair can be.
You wouldn’t believe how many Freddy Mercury comments I’ve gotten… from friends and random people on the street. (basically equal to John Travolta when I grow my hair out and push it up and back Grease-style)
I always get a kick out of stuff like that… and it IS amazing how differently people will respond to me in one direction or another by doing something as natural as growing my hair, allowing my beard or mustache to get a bit bushy, or what have you. I wonder how much that ends affecting our confidence, positively or negatively, over time?
I love you all — you’re awesome.
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I remember my dad referring to his mustache as a “cookie duster.” He said food would always get caught in his beard and mustache, and his face itched. He was glad to get it shaved off. The hair on his head was light brown, but his beard and mustache were red.
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I have never received a negative comment about my mustache, and now beard. The mustache came from a woman who wanted me to cover my crooked teeth. The beard from my daughter who wanted me to look like Dumbledore. I live in Korea. Everyone bows to me in respect for my beard- age.
100 years ago most men wore beards. It was a sign of masculinity. and independence. To emasculate and control the male population, corporations and government gradually made it a rule that me become clean shaven. Women have thicker skin and can bear cold weather better. A beard is certainly welcome as the weather gets colder in winter. Like a cat mine thickens in winter and thins in summer.
I am more comfortable with a white beard than when it was dark. White is more friendly and approachable.
Cheers.
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Huh, Do you have ‘Movember” there? In Australia, men grow moustaches for November to raise money and awareness for men’s cancers. Funny you picked November to do it. I’m afraid it looks like one of Magnum PIs cousins to me! Maybe you should start up Movember there!
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My husband has awesome chops =) guys compliment him ALL the time and most women like them as well. He had one woman ask if she could touch them =) I’ve never known any other feature, on anyone, to get more unsolicited complements then his chops.
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I am a stage actor, currently in a production of Fiddler On the Roof, and therefore obligated to maintain a full beard that simply does not look good on my face. It’s a little patchy; I blame genetics. But Dr. K has shown me the silver lining! On closing night, I’m DEFINITELY shaving it into a rockin’ mustache. Expect angry e-mails from my girlfriend, Doc.
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I’ve had a full beard for the last 40 years. It has hardly ever been commented on by men or women when I lived in the UK or here in Australia. This doesn’t surprise me as it’s a basic male characteristic. Why shave it off every day as if it was something bad or abnormal? I’m a teacher – maybe things are different in business?
